The Dilemma

It’s not easy but parents, especially working mums, find it a challenge to keep themselves sane while balancing work and family. It is just like walking on a tightrope. Too much work and it tips over to one side. When demands of family become overwhelming, there is a tendency to tip over the other side.

“I passed over an attractive job offer because it requires me to stay overseas for few months, so that my toddler doesn’t miss Mummy,” says Winnie, not without a tinge of regret.

“It’s been tough,” admits Jean who works 8-hour shifts and is a mother of two girls, aged 6 and 9. “After a long day at work, I’ve to check my elder girl’s homework. If she makes mistakes, I’ve got to explain to her.”

Fortunately for Jean, this took a turn for the better when she consulted the teacher and was asked to leave the teaching to the school. Thereafter, Jean’s time was freed up to allow her to catch up on the latest news or spend time just chatting with her girls.

Dealing with Guilt

Guilt invariably sets in when parents perceive that they are not spending as much time with the family as they should. The best strategy to deal with guilt is to stop feeling that way and do whatever it takes to feel good for ourselves. Establishing a good relationship with the caregiver and having a fall-back arrangement to take care of our kids when they are sick are important too. These give us a peace of mind while we are at work.

Making the Best Use of Time

Some parents make the best out of whatever little time they have with their children.

“We fetch the kids back from school. In the car, we catch up with their day,” shares Wendy.

“Weekends for me are strictly for the family. I value the time we spend on outings or simply chilling out at home,” shares Alice.

Here’s a useful tip from a family counsellor:

“Find a tree. Unload your work problems, or whatever issues you may have onto the tree - Leave them behind you. You’ll find that you are more relaxed, ready to face your children and your family after an exhausting day at work.”